What it’s About: After having been forced underground hundreds of years before, humans finally have a plan to try and defeat the robotic race that now dominate the earth.

The Verdict: I really wanted to like this – I mean it must take some sort of genius to replace ‘form’ with ‘morph’ – but unfortunately I was let down. Transmorphers is really only let down by its second half. The first half is spent slowly building our excitement for this grand battle between humans and robots which awaits us. Full of all the great things you’d expect from a low budget film from The Asylum (bad acting, bad effects – just bad everything in general) I was very excited for an unashamedly bad (yet somehow enthralling) robot vs. humans war. Unfortunately the battle kind of sucks and goes on forever. Once you’ve seen them battle it out for the first few minutes you’ve seen it all – no new locations are introduced and everyone just fights the same the whole time. Once we get into battle mode the music ramps up – so much so that it is very often impossible to hear what actors are saying over this and the loud sound effects. Luckily plot isn’t that important in this film otherwise it would have been very easy to get lost as to what was happening. I found it strange that a highly ranked woman was referred to by everyone as ‘sir’ – in fact I even began to think for a while due to this and her being in a relationship with another woman that she was actually playing a man...she wasn’t.

Whilst it started out looking like this was going to be craptastic, it soon descended into a complete borefest.

(2 and a 1/2 Craptastic Stars)


Golden Craptastic Moment: Any moment containing digital effects. This film has some truly terrible effects. You’ve got to love the fact that The Asylum really don’t seem to care that their budgets are too small to properly achieve much of what they have in their scripts. The effects in this film are often so dreadful they would look bad in a cgi animated cartoon from the 90s.